culinary skills
by Winter Thunder
Summary: Levy decides that she wants to eat dinner at home for once, but it quickly becomes clear that neither of them are particularly skilled in a culinary sense, for a few different reasons...  Levy/Gazille, oneshot.


_Summary:_ Levy decides that she wants to eat dinner at home for once, but it quickly becomes clear that neither of them are particularly skilled in a culinary sense, for a few different reasons...

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><p><strong>culinary skills<strong>

levy x gazille

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><p>When Gazille saw the clouds of smoke emanating from their house, his lazy walk transformed into an all-out sprint, his thoughts alternating between extreme worry and <em>'Dammit, if she let that fire moron into our flat…'<em>

"Levy!" he shouted, throwing the door open. He was instantly assaulted by the smell of smoke, which made his eyes water and his throat close up, but thankfully, the smoke wasn't nearly as bad is it appeared from the outside. There was only a faint haze the covered the flat. Someone coughed.

"G-Gazille?" Levy croaked, waving smoke away from smarting eyes.

"Hey," he hurried over to her side and led her outside into the fresh air. "You okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I just had an accident with the oven…and the stove…" She broke into coughs again. She sighed as Gazille rubbed her back gently. "I was trying out some of the recipes Lucy gave me…I thought I'd try making dinner for once." Gazille hid a smirk, already guessing where this was going. "But then I figured out one of the rune books I got on that one mission, remember? So I went to go do some translating…and I kind of forgot I was cooking…" she finished sheepishly.

"So you burned _everything_?"

"…I may have also accidentally set the oven temperature too high…"

Gazille laughed.

"What?" Levy demanded indignantly, hiding her amusement. "I don't know about you, but I'm kind of tired of take-out and eating at the guild! Wouldn't it be nice to eat at home for once?"

The Iron Dragon Slayer kissed her temple. "How 'bout next time we try it together, so if you get distracted, I can make sure our place doesn't burn down." Levy grinned.

"Good plan." She frowned. "But what do you want to eat for dinner today?"

"Let's just go to th' guild."

"But…our place…"

"Set an enchantment so we can leave everything open, air the place out while we're gone," Gazille said, thumping her head lightly. "Come on, S-class."

"Oh, shut up." As she sent words whirling around their home, Levy sighed.

"What?"

"We're going to have so much laundry to do…I bet everything smells like smoke now."

"It's not a big deal."

"Do you _want_ to go everywhere smelling like you slept over at Natsu's?" Levy demanded.

Gazille looked repulsed. "On second thought…" Levy laughed and looped her arm through his.

"Come on, you, let's go get dinner."

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><p>"Oh, <em>shit<em>!" Gazille said, sitting up suddenly as the smell of burning food reached his nose. He scrambled out of bed, yanked on his pants and ran to the kitchen.

"What is it?" Levy asked, hurrying out of their bed as she wrapped a sheet around herself.

He yanked open the oven and turned off the stove before surveying the damage done to their dinner.

It didn't look very edible. And he was pretty sure they had set the oven too high again. The glass look like it had cracked.

Levy sighed as she opened the windows in the kitchen. "At least there wasn't as much smoke this time."

"True," he agreed.

"You know, this wouldn't have happened if you hadn't distracted me," Levy said accusingly. "Now we have to go out again!"

"_I_ distracted _you_?" Gazille advanced on her. "I think it was the other way around."

"It's not _my_ fault that you got sauce all over your shirt and took it off and wouldn't put a new one on!" Levy argued as she stepped backwards.

"And who got marinade in her _hair_ and wouldn't wear anything but a shirt after she showered?"

"Hey, this is your fault, not mine!" Levy squeaked as she turned and ran for their bedroom. Gazille growled and swept her up, depositing her on his shoulder. "Put me down!"

"Gladly," Gazille said, grinning as he dropped her on their bed.

"You know," Levy said conversationally as she unwound the sheet from around herself and pulled him down, "this is still your fault."

"How about," Gazille said between kisses, "we just don't cook."

Levy rolled them so she was on top. She kissed him deeply before making her way down his chest. "Deal."

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><p><strong>alternate ending:<strong>

"…Gazille…" Levy said, her voice strangled.

The Iron Dragon Slayer grimaced, taking in the damage to their kitchen. It was very…_black._ And smelly.

Levy opened and closed her mouth a few times, then sighed and gave up. She was at a loss for words.

If anything, Gazille's attempt to cook—which somehow ended up involving Natsu and a competition—ended even more disastrously than hers. They were probably going to have to redo the whole kitchen.

"The landlord is going to have a fit," Levy finally said.

"Eh." Gazille shrugged and ushered her out of their flat. "Guild?"

"Guild. And we never try to cook again."

"Deal."

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><p><strong>disclaimer: <strong>I do not own Fairy Tail or anything related to it; I do, however, own this story idea/plotline/etc.

**written:** 06 November 2011

**published: **06 November 2011

**word count:** 800 (including alternate ending)

**notes:**

-Kind of a rush piece, but I still like it. The idea just suddenly popped up into my head and I literally wrote it out in about 20 minutes. But I've been deprived of L/G and I haven't been writing lately (too busy, or no inspiration) so...hopefully this will tide you over for now.

-Yes, there are two endings. I originally wrote the more PG one, but my brain suddenly decided that it wanted a hint of lime, and I thought that ending was funnier.

**request(s):**

-If you caught any mistakes (of any kind), please let me know!

-Tell me how it turned out and _review_, yeah?

-If you liked this, check out my other L/G stories, which I promise will be updated eventually! (See announcement on my profile.)


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